Mother’s Day 2013

Posted in Family, Motherhood, Snapshots of Life by

I had a lovely Mother’s Day this year. Really, they are lovely every year. My family always does such a good job making me feel special.

I’m not a gift-getting sort of person. Not to say that I don’t like getting gifts, but I just don’t need them to feel loved. One time I took a Five Love Languages test and I scored a big, fat zero for gifts. Lucky for David. :)

What I do love is thoughtful gestures and food (now that’s my love language). And when those two things collide–oh happy happy, joy joy! You’ve just made my day.

Lucky for me, my family knows me well. This is what the girls came up with for my Mother’s Day gift…

MD13 bfast

We were in Ft. Worth (per my request) at my in-laws over Mother’s Day weekend and the girls asked my mother-in-law to help them make me a special breakfast. I was completely oblivious to the goings-on and didn’t even realize they were sneaking around setting the table and making things special for me. I had just settled down in the living room when Abigail came over and told me to close my eyes and come to the table. She guided me over and the girls presented that beautiful place setting, just for me. I could not have asked for a better gift! Abigail had invaded my stash of cards and found one she thought would work for Mother’s Day and all three kids wrote sweet sentiments inside. They did this all on their own. David didn’t even know about it until the night before.

It’s things like this that make me so happy to be a mom. To know that despite the squabbles and the hard days wondering if I’m doing anything right as I raise these three not-so-little people, my kids are learning some things about serving others and being kind and thoughtful. They are such wonderful kids and I am honored to be called their mom.

A New{ish} Adventure

Posted in Family, God's creation, Travels by

Way back in 2007 we took the kids on their first camping trip. Look how little they are, especially Isabel!

It was a couple years before we went camping again and we had every intention of making it a more regular family activity. For some reason though we just never ventured back out.

Until  a month ago.

Let me back up a bit and share a little something with you. I’ve shared before that I went back to school in the fall. I was so excited to get back into the classroom again, even though I knew it was going to be hard. Wow. That’s the understatement of the year.

It has been way more difficult than I thought it would be. Not only have I had to adjust to actually thinking again (the horror!), but I’ve had to adjust to juggling an already hectic family schedule. Between school for me, the kids (the girls homeschool three days a week), gymnastics, Scouts, volleyball, work (oh my goodness, I forgot I have a part-time job!), laundry, cooking, shopping…well, I was pretty sure I was going to have a mental breakdown a couple times. And I’m completely serious about that. Toward the end of last semester I was a mess. The day I took my chemistry lab final I came home and I bawled my eyes out. And I just don’t do that.

This semester has been a little better, mostly because I’ve gotten the hang of things a bit, but I’ve still had some super difficult moments. I still think I’m a mess, but by God’s grace I’m dealing. As I got further along into this semester I started to think about ways we could mellow out as a family. I realize that there are families that have way busier schedules than we do, but for us this was just too much. All the rushing around and always being in a frantic hurry was not how I wanted our family to function. It was not for us.

The one thing that kept coming back to me was the idea of getting outside. Not just outside in the yard or even down the street to the park (although that is important too), but outside and away from town. No hustle and bustle. No computers or TVs or cell phones vying for our attention. We desperately needed to get away where it was quiet and where we could see and hear God in His marvelous creation.

It was funny to me that I was becoming so desperate to get out camping because I think I’ve been the main reason we haven’t been out camping much these past few years. Bugs and dirt and wild animals? Not my thing. But trees and flowers and fresh air and QUIET? Yes, please.

So I told David we have to do something. We need to get outside. I need to get outside. I need to breathe.

We’ve been hoping to get an RV for a couple years, and I think in our heads we kept thinking “Well, we’ll go camping when we get the RV.” But that just isn’t going to happen anytime soon, so we went to Academy and bought a nice big tent, some extra sleeping bags, and few other camping essentials and made a reservation for a state park not too far away. It was a quick one-night getaway, but it was so nice. So nice.

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This time we are making camping a priority. It’s not always easy for us to find the time to get away, but David and I both feel it is a necessary thing for our family. Nature is full of God’s glory and He reveals Himself to us in it. I don’t want to miss out. I don’t want any of us to miss out. This is God’s way of allowing us just a glimpse of Himself.

For since the creation of the world his invisible attributes–his eternal power and divine nature–have been clearly seen, because they are understood through what has been made. So people are without excuse.

~Romans 1:20 (NET)

We are heading to the Grand Canyon soon and I cannot wait! To watch the sun rise and set over the canyon?  Glorious!

How many living things you have made, O LORD!

You have exhibited great skill in making all of them;

the earth is full of the living things you have made.

~ Psalm 104:24 (NET)

My Gift to You

Posted in Following Jesus by

It is a rare thing for me to remember something I read or hear. I can read a book, nodding in agreement, underlining furiously, but when all is said and done I can barely tell you what the book was about. The same goes for sermons or seminars or other such things. I can agree wholeheartedly with what is said, even feeling like the Lord is truly telling me something through the message, but once I’m home…gone.

This is a huge frustration for me. I have read so many wonderful books and blog posts over the years, heard sermon after sermon that has touched my soul, but when it comes time to share those nuggets of truth with others the words just won’t come. I’ve learned to write things down and all my books are so marked up, all in the hopes that I can at least go back and see what I’ve underlined in order to jog my memory.

But every once in a while something sticks. Something I read or hear will really make its mark and I won’t be able to get it out of my head. I am beginning to think that these are the things that I’m supposed to focus on. Perhaps these are my passions and I haven’t even been all that aware of it.

One of these things is something I heard several years back. About three years ago I was listening to the audio version of Stuff Christians Like by Jon Acuff. If you have ever read this book or his blog by the same name you will know that it is funny, funny stuff. And it was even funnier being able to listen to Jon read the book himself. Laugh out loud hilarious!

What I didn’t know when I listened to the book is that on Wednesdays on his blog, Jon writes more seriously. He calls it Serious Wednesdays. Weird, I know. One of the chapters in the book was from a post he wrote way back in 2009 titled Confessing ‘Safe Sins’. I encourage you to read it yourself (it’s not very long), but the gist is often when we are in small(ish) groups our tendency is to only share the “safe sins.” The ones that might not make us sound too terribly sinful.

…what happens when people start confessing safe sins is that everyone else in the room starts concealing their real junk.

It sucks that as broken as we all are, as desperate as we all are for a Savior, we feel compelled to clean ourselves up when we get around each other.

~Jon Acuff

It’s hard to be the first one to share our junk–the things going on deep inside that you are afraid to talk about. Even though you know–YOU KNOW–you are not the only one struggling, it’s hard to truly believe it because we are all putting on our best faces. Why is that? We try so hard to look like we’ve to it all together. Someone has to be the first to open up, giving everyone else a precious gift. Jon calls it “the gift of going second.”

And that’s what has stuck in my mind all these years…that idea of giving people the gift of going second. This is what I have wanted to do with this blog from the beginning and I know I’ve written along these lines before. I want to share my story in such a way that anyone reading will know that I am flawed and most certainly do not have it all together. I don’t want it to be a downer or whine-fest, but I want the words I share to be real.

I’ll be honest, my life is not full of stories of crazy outside rebellion. No crime sprees or drunken parties or infidelity. This has made me wonder if I really have anything to offer. What do I know of the ways of the world? But you better believe my life has been full of plenty of inside rebellion. Rebellion against God and His Word. Bitterness. Anger. Selfishness. Pride. Envy. Laziness. These are on-going battles and things I need to deal with often. Probably far more often than I should. And these struggles–these sins–are just as abhorrent in God’s eyes as any outward and visible rebellion.

My prayer for this space is that I am transparent about my struggles, and in that transparency it might allow someone else (even if just one person) to feel safe to open up about their own struggles. My story will not speak to everyone, but I believe it will speak to some.

So this is my gift to you. I’ll go first, so you feel safe going second.

The Day Has Arrived! {And a Few Thoughts on Motherhood}

Posted in Family, Home Sweet Home, Motherhood by

Well, it’s official. As of yesterday we have a teenager in the house!

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I seriously cannot believe we are at this point. And the crazy thing is, we are on the homestretch with this one. Five years from now he will be just about to graduate from high school and getting ready to head off to college. Hold me.

This kid–this boy who made me a mama–is a treasure. He’s funny, smart, and kind. It seems like he came walking and talking right out of the womb, and he hasn’t stopped moving or talking since. He’s curious, quick-witted, and has a memory that astounds us. He’s seeking after God more all the time and nothing–NOTHING–brings me more joy than to see him desire to follow Jesus. I look forward to seeing just what God has planned to do in and through him in the coming years.

I’ve learned a lot about motherhood during these past thirteen years. Mostly, I’ve learned a lot about myself and it hasn’t always been pretty. Motherhood is the single most difficult thing I have ever done. Hands down. So many people talk about how hard marriage is, but for me, being a mom is far and away more difficult. That doesn’t mean that I don’t like being a mom. I love being a mother to each one of my children and I can’t imagine life without any of them. They bring joy and laughter into my days…and tears from time to time. God has used motherhood as a refining tool for me. That can be a painful process, but God also gives me the grace to handle each situation and the ability to change those less than stellar qualities in myself.

Some days are hard. Some days the hands on the clock can’t move fast enough until bedtime. There are times I wonder if I’ll make it through the day with my sanity intact.

But despite the struggles and failures I can rest assured that God has given me these three children to raise, nurture, and care for. He knew what my weaknesses were even before those little ones were a thought in my mind. He fashioned each one of us, and created a family that is by His design. We are far from perfect, that’s for sure, but God’s power is made perfect in our weaknesses. His grace is sufficient {2 Corinthians 12:9}.

At the end of the day when I tuck my children in bed and they give me kisses and hugs and say, “I love you, mommy,” I know it is all worth it. All the challenges I might face as a mom are nothing compared to the grace God shows me through those three precious lives.

Such a gift.

Don’t you see that children are GOD’s best gift?

the fruit of the womb his generous legacy?

~ Psalm 127:3 (The Message)